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Parenting, the most Complex, Challenging and Crucial job in the world comes without instructions!
Holly presents communication skills pioneered by Dr. Thomas Gordon (Parent Effectiveness Training - P.E.T.) and adds a 'Self Awareness Process' for parents to effectively and successfully put these skills into practice with their children.
Communication Skills:
- Talk so children will feel understood
- Talk so children will understand you
- Get family rules children will follow
- Resolve conflicts so nobody loses
- Learn how parents unknowingly block communication
- Deal constructively with 'values' collisions
Self Awareness Skills:
- Understand and deal with our strong reactions to our children
- Notice, identify and process our feelings
- Honour our needs and our children's
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Next Program
To be announced.
Newmarket, Ontario
What they are saying about E.P. ... Effective Parenting with Holly Kretschmer provides invaluable tools and awareness to help parents give their children the feeling, carefree childhood they need. Janice Berger, Psychotherapist and author of "Emotional Fitness"
I turned to E.P. because I was searching for an alternative to permissive parenting and to domineering parenting. I wanted to live in an environment where everyone's needs were respected. I feel closer to my two children, ages 5 and 8 years old. It's not a quick-fix; it's a long-term fix!
Wendy Y.
Teacher
E.P. is truly an amazing program. The course, where real life issues are discussed and skills reinforced on a weekly basis, is what makes it work. Even though my kids are older (18 and 21), I am finding the skills very useful in improving my relationships with them. Barb A.
Policy Analyst
My husband, who had taken the course primarily because I asked him to, has been overwhelmed by how much he has learned in just a few weeks about both himself and effective communication skills. He has become a much more open and expressive person, able to communicate better than before, and the result has been a higher level of intimacy and closeness that I had always wanted in our relationship E.P. has been invaluable to the development of our relationship.
Michelle Liem
Marketing Professional 
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About Children and Parenting Nurturing their child is the most important way any parent can show their love. Most parents strive to be their child's 'best parent in the world.' The fact is parent's buttons get pushed by their children and most often parents don't know how to effectively deal with it. When a parent's buttons are pushed, it's difficult in the heat of the moment to separate the child from the problem without blaming and emotionally hurting the child. Self awareness skills assist parents to take ownership of their own feelings and also effectively communicate with their child. There is an important difference between simply stating what behaviour is unacceptable to you as a parent vs. labeling and judging a child.  How you say what you need to say makes all the difference between resolving or not unwanted behaviour and keeping your child's self-esteem in tact in the process. Even more powerful is when you identify what it is you are feeling and tell your child how you feel about their behaviour and the concrete effect it has on you.
Relationship skills are important in every child's life. Our early relationship with our parents or caregivers, influence the kind of person each of us becomes. One of the most important aspects of the parent-child relationship is whether or not both needs are being met. The more needs that can be filled as a child, the less unmet needs children bring to their adult relationships. For example, if our parents or caregivers did not accept us the way we were as a child, we may act out our need for approval in our adult relationships.
 All children have social and psychological needs and at young ages are dependent on their parents to help them to fulfill those needs. When needs are not met, the natural connection between parent and child becomes stressed and negative feelings are generated. Unless these feelings are dealt with, they can lead to explosive and/or withdrawn behaviours. Defense mechanisms replace healthy ways of relating and the parent-child relationship suffers. Dr. Thomas Gordon is acknowledged worldwide as the pioneer of parent training. He was a licensed Psychologist, Past President of the California State Psychologist Association and a past member of the International Academy of Professional Counseling and Psychotherapy. He authored six books and contributed chapters in eight others.
Doctor Gordon developed Parent Effectiveness Training in 1962 to help parents develop effective communication skills to use with their children so everyone can experience a joyous family life.
The program is structured around a "Relationship Credo" and self awareness skills. The foundation of the credo reflects the importance of parents honouring their own needs and their child's. Who owns the problem determines the unique set of skills parents use, with their child to problem solve so everyone's needs are met.
 Each week parents open up to their own childhood experiences and practice new skills learned in class before applying them at home through role-plays such as "The Bathroom Traffic Problem" and "The Scattered Laundry Problem." The following week parents talk about the results of the new skills used at home with their unique problems. Sharing is optional and might feel awkward at first, but the stories that emerge are truly heart warming. Parents feel relieved to hear that others are experiencing similar problems and have not been equipped to deal with them effectively. Parents continue to say that this is one of the many strengths of the program.
Who should attend? - Parents with children of all ages (including teenagers and adult children), married, single and soon to be parents.
I practice what I teach.
When I sense a power struggle with one of my children is imminent, it's a cue that what I'm doing isn't going to produce the best result. The struggle isn't about them; it's about my past, and as a responsible parent, I know I have the personal power to change my approach and bring about a result that satisfies my needs, and the needs of my children. I practice the E.P. skills everyday; this has helped me to have a positive influence on the lives of my children and allow them to be who they are.
I am touched by those who want to develop a deeper understanding of themselves and become more effective in shaping the lives of their children. 
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